Yanking the game not always the solution...

Regarding the tragic death of Brandon Crisp:

Investigators eyeing the death of gamer Brandon Crisp are speculating that the 15-year-old likely succumbed to hypothermia, according to media reports Friday.

Crisp's body was found Wednesday in an undisturbed condition by deer hunters in a wooded area several miles from his home. Police said they do not suspect foul play.

Crisp had been missing for about three weeks from his house in Barrie, Ontario, a small Canadian city about 60 miles north of Toronto. Crisp bolted after a dispute with his parents over the amount of time he spent playing Call Of Duty 4: Modern Warfare on his Microsoft (NSDQ: MSFT) Xbox.

Crisp was "addicted" to playing online video games, particularly Call Of Duty 4, over Microsoft's Xbox Live online gaming service, according to reports. The game allows players to assume the character of a contemporary combat soldier.

This case is a tragic example of why "take that game away" is not always an appropriate solution when it becomes apparent that something is going wrong in a young person's life or within the family system. Gaming may be part of what's wrong - it may not be the only thing that's wrong. And if an individual is using gaming to cope with other problems, just pulling the game away without adequately dealing with other co-occurring disorders can have disasterous consequences.

It can be difficult to understand why some people play too much, and there are more variables than can be predicted. As I always say, "it's complicated" and ideally professional help should be sought from mental health clinicians who understand gaming and internal player dynamics, behavioral addictions, and family system therapy.

Japanese woman jailed for killing "husband's" avatar

Yes, a high percentage of online gamers take in-game friendships and romantic relationships seriously. People who have never met in real life do develop intense intense attachments in online games. They identify with their avatars.

The Associated Press reported on October 25th that a 43 year old female teacher in Japan was jailed and criminally charged after her in-game spouse jilted her, and she responded by hacking into his account and murdering his avatar. The entire story can be found here:
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5i6uWUGXDt2weftMFg76UD1qyWabwD940B2DG0

Looking at the psychology of the virtual world experience, we come back to the question "What is reality?"

For many people the virtual is very, very real.

Games Magazine Editor on GTA IV

Thomas L. McDonald has been covering games for 17 years. He is an editor at large for Games Magazine. These thoughts come from www.maximumpc.com.

"Watching Grand Theft Auto IV rack up the highest recorded sales in gaming history was one of the most disappointing things I've witnessed in 10-plus years of covering this hobby.

This is utter nonsense, even by the game's own rather warped standards. Putting aside the flaky driving model, clipping problems, and cliched plot and dialogue, there is a gigantic elephant in the room that the gaming press seems hell-bent on ignoring: the issue of morality. It's like we're afraid to acknowledge the rancid, misogynistic ethics of GTA4 because we might give aid and comfort to those who want to control or suppress the freedom of game designers to create. Tough luck. This is simply a vile game utterly lacking any recognizably human moral context.

As Warren Spector, the man behind Deus Ex, recently observed, "GTA is the ulitmate urban thuggery simulation, and you can't take a step back from that. I am frustrated that the games in the GTA series, some of the finest combination of pure game design and commercial appeal, offer a fictional package that makes them difficult to hold up as examples of what our medium is capable of achieving."

Exactly right. DePalma's Scarface has a stronger sense of right and wrong, and The Sopranos is positively conservative by comparison. Like it or not, there is a difference between what movies and games can get away with. The Sopranos is a drama in which the viewer is a passive observer. In GTA, the character is under your control: The choices are yours. That distinction matters...

...Dan and Sam Houser have given the government the gun it's going to use to put a bullet in the brainpan of the gaming industry. Why the hell are we defending them?" - Thomas McDonald

Principles of neuroplasticity indicate that any activity we engage in repetitively does change the way we think and perceive reality - even if on subtle levels beneath conscious awareness. I'll be posting more on this topic in the future. In the meantime, I highly recommend Dan Siegel's book The Developing Mind.

Mom tells kid no more World of Warcraft

Thoughts below.

Mom tells kid no more WOW

Okay, a brief breakdown of this very typical family drama (apparently accidently recorded over game voice chat and posted by other players).

My gut reaction is painful as everyone is so out of tune with one another, the communication is derailed, and insight seems to be lacking on all fronts. These folks need help!

I've seen people comment that they young many is whiney, manipulative, immature, etc. I would say he has no self-regulatory ability whatsoever and doesn't seem to be in an environment which is helping him achieve any. He doesn't know what he's doing (though he is caught up in something that looks a lot like an addictive process with WoW) -and his parents doen't understand either. It's sad!!

I'd start by working to educate the parents. I'd want them to understand the following:

• Their first mistake is assuming that a young guy this age is capable of self-monitoring and self-control. No one this age has a mature brain and their expectations for him are unrealistic.
• Their son is playing a game with a structure they do not understand. He is highly caught up in the structured reinforcement system. This in-game structure is very powerful and it's expected that it would impact him this way. He has a need to play for multiple reasons that are based in neurobiology. He craves this experience.
• It is for many people (even mature adults) impossible to play WoW without getting caught in the reinforcment structure and losing control
• Many people experience dissociation and time loss while playing MMOs. Kids with ADHD often have "selective attention" and will concentrate so much on one activity that they ignore everything else around them. Whatever his internal experience is, it further impairs his judgment.
• I believe he is indicating (some of it is garbled) that he "just got a group together" and is eager to complete a new and important task in the game. "How long it will take" is never something that can be predicted in advance. Again, they are asking him to do something that is impossible and they don't understand this. He naturally becomes frustrated (and responds with manipulation, which must have worked for him in the past).
• By "bailing" on the group he will face a tremendous loss of esteem, particularly if he's the one who just organized it.
• The other group members are listening to all this over the voice chat system. It's likely he's so upset he's not aware of this.
• The parents say "You can finish it tomorrow night." Again, they don't understand that an MMO doesn't work this way. He's playing in real time, with real people, and he will not be able to "pick up where he left off."
• I'd like to ask them who provided him with a computer, the game, and the broadband connection? Most likely they are paying his monthly subscription fee with their credit card. Essentially they have enabled the entire process and don't understand what they have done.
• Trying to use "logic" at this time in this situation is completely counter productive. They're trying to communicate with the wrong part of his brain. Some more creative interventions need to be developed.
• Mom and Dad don't seem to have any insight regarding what motivates their son to play. There are likely multiple reasons, some possibly having to do with real life (as opposed to virtual life) deficits, and if they don't figure this out they can't successfully solve the problem.

It's my hope that parents learn to play any game their child is playing and understand how to prevent these problems from developing in the first place. This situation is now so out of control that some sort of professional help is probably necessary. I'm frequently asked to consult regarding cases that have erupted into domestic violence. Hopefully they can find a therapist who understands the gaming process.

Final thought to Dad: NO, this is not "just a game."

One of the most surprising things I've ever heard

One of my colleagues phoned the director of a large family counseling agency in Los Angeles recently to share that a workshop is being offered in their community to train mental health professionals on the topic of video gaming and the associated risks and benefits. Those of us who are intimately familiar with gaming realize that in general, mental health professionals are less than culturally competent when it comes to issues related to electronic media and their clients.

The agency director's response proved that point.

"We don't need any training on that topic" she said. "Our counselors only deal with typical adolescent issues."

Ummm, excuse me, but isn't gaming an extremely "typical" activity among people of all ages, particularly adolescents? And while most people have absolutely no impairments from their gaming activities, it's not news that a substantial number are struggling with compulsive playing that interferes with important aspects of life...

Is it?

For the director of a large mental health agency in a major urban area to be so oblivious to the issue shocks me. It really is one of the most surprising things I've ever heard.

More on this topic next time.

Yes - People Change

Two weeks ago I sold my xbox. After 50+ days without playing, it had become exceedingly obvious that my life was better without gamin’. I haven’t transformed into an instant superior version of myself, but my life is slowly heading in a new, and I think better, direction. I’m discovering new interests, new goals, and most importantly new found confidence in myself. So I am happy to report that after going 65 days without gamin’, I no longer feel the urge to play…at least not everyday. I do occasionally feel the “pull” when I see a commerical on tv, or when I pass the video game section in a store. But then, I’ve been playing video games for over two decades, so it’s probably gonna take more than two months to lick this thing.

This is the latest entry from the blog Death by 360 - One Man's Struggle with Game Addiction. http://deathby360.wordpress.com/ (linked by permission)

In a series of 18 brief posts that begin in January 2008, he shares exactly what it's like to come to the awareness that something is wrong with his life due to excessive gaming, and explains exactly why and how he decides to make changes.

It's honest, intelligent, and beautifully written. Reading it will help other people far more than anything I can say.

I find it frustrating when people ask me "What's the treatment for video game addiction?" as if it's something I can explain in three sentences or less. I can't even explain what game addiction is in three sentences or less, as there continues to be so much controversy over whether or not it exists. There is no simple screening device that can let us know precisely what's going on in any person's head. We have to spend a bit of time sorting out patterns of behavior, thought, and emotions to get a true sense of what someone is experiencing and in what way it may relate to their gaming habits.

It's terrific when people self-monitor and figure this out for themselves. It's absolutely wonderful when they find solutions for themselves that work to solve the problem. Sometimes the journey begins by hearing someone else's story and having a little encouragement along the way from friends.

So what's the treatment for game addiction? If you read this blog you'll get a very good idea. And in this case, it had nothing to do with shrinks.

Time Loss - "Ummm yeah, I played for days..."

In reviewing video footage and notes I've taken over the past three years of my own detailed study of MMO gaming, the most common reason that people report getting into trouble with gaming is what we can call the experience of time loss - losing track of time to the extent that one plays for hours upon hours, even days at at time, seemingly without full awareness of how long it's been.

"I went three straight days once" a 28 year old woman admitted with a grin, "I usually play until I fall asleep at my keyboard." College students and adults in their 40s and 50s routinely confess to playing 12 or 15 hours at a time, skipping eating and using empty Mountain Dew bottles in very creative ways.

This can be hard for a lot of people to understand. I get it though - mainly because I've been there. Back in my active clan days in Lineage2 I felt the pull to play "Just one more hour," eating the microwaved frozen burrito while sitting at the keyboard, and neglecting bathroom breaks because "I can't leave the party now - I'm the only healer." I know it sounds weird but you sort of have to be there.

You don't have to be a genius to see that this kind of play impairs real life. And, that there must be some interesting things going on that cause it. I've been immersed in a good book before, staying awake an hour or two longer than I should to get to the end, but I've never behaved like I did while playing in the MMO.

Of course you've got the sophisticated reinforcers built into the game, and the social commitment to the other players you've bonded with who need you (or rather, need your character) to stay. But I think there's often something deeper going on, and on a psychological level I'd refer to it as the process of dissociation.

Dissociation in a nutshell can be described as an alteration in consciousness in which the mind is split off from normal awareness and surroundings. It can be experienced on a continuum, from the mild way you can get caught up in an exciting movie, to the more extreme forms where you lose touch with your physical sensations and the environment around you, losing track of the passing of time (sound like something already mentioned?).

Therapists generally believe that extreme degrees of dissociation are indicative of a mental process gone awry. Something is wrong, and it's happened (or is happening) for a reason. These reasons can be many and varied.

Some people find the experience of dissociation pleasant, and for brief periods of time mild degrees of dissociation are not necessarily harmful; they can even do some good. Sometimes they are intentionally induced through religious trance states or clinical hypnosis.

However if people are staying in a state of dissociation for hours and hours, experiencing time loss to the point their lives are being impaired - well, maybe we should be asking "Why?" and
taking a look at the deeper issues.

The Brain That Changes Itself

It's a rare book that impresses me so much I carry copies of it around to thrust in front of people shouting "You must read this!" Okay, I'm not actually shouting, but I am vigorously singing the praises of Norman Doidge, M.D.'s The Brain That Changes Itself - Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science.

There are just so many ways to apply the information in this book, particularly for those who write me asking "Why is it so hard for me to make changes, and what can I actually do differently?" It's certainly not a self-help book, as Dr. Doidge isn't giving simple answers to complex problems, but I do think many will find information that provides insight into the causes of compulsive behaviors as well as fuel for creative solutions.

Norman Doidge, M.D., is a psychiatrist, psychoanalyst, researcher, author, essayist and poet. He is on the Research Faculty at the Columbia University Center for Psychoanalytic Training and Research, in New York, and the University of Toronto's Department of Psychiatry. A native of Toronto, he divides his time between Toronto and New York. http://www.normandoidge.com/

In his book he shares remarkable information about the science of neuroplasticity, long a subject of great interest to me. I've read a great deal of research previously - however I've never seen anything as easily digestable and presented with such clear and compelling relevancy.

Along with many inspiring stories of remarkable recoveries from brain injuries, Dr. Doidge hones in on aspects of culture (particularly electronic media) and the ways that our brains are quite literally being changed by how we interact with our environment. One of the things I often discuss with people is facilitating inner change by modifying one's entire enviornment in positive ways.

This information is useful to me in each domain of my major interests, from my exploration of the impact of online gaming and virtual worlds, my work as a psychotherapist using multiple modalities to help people achieve positive change, and as a dance/movement therapist working to integrate the mind and body and facilitate healing.

The book is important. Get it.

(sorry for being bossy - I realize this conflicts with my usual non-directive apprach)